Do not judge- use " I - communication"...

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We are told to not judge.
But how easy it is while communicating with your spouse, child, mother or friend
accuse the other person by starting to say: YOU.
"You never listen to me."
"You never spend time with me."
"You always leave your socks on the floor."
"You play too much videogames."
"You never help me to clean the kitchen." 
and so on...I guess you know what I'm talking about...
Without noticing we are accusing the other person with whom we are talking.
But the " YOU - communication " is not the right one!

Instead the right way to communicate is to use the " I  communication".
Start by saying I...
" I miss you and I wish you could spend some time with me."
"I'm sorry you play so much video games so we don't have time to do other things together."
"I'm very tired today.Can we clean the kitchen together?"

It is actually harder to start by saying I...than starting accusing the other person but it's good
because when you start by saying I you normally will think about
more carefully what to say. In this way you really say how you feel
about the things and what you would aspect from the other person.

So I encourage you to use the "I communication ";
it's a love language!

You can be sure that other people will respond to you in a different,
more positive way while you are not accusing them.

Dear heavenly Father,
help us to talk without judging so that we'll not be judged.
Help us to use the right way of communication; the love language... so that
our words will be a blessing to other people.
In Jesus name.



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